deathz0r Online: The Internet Made Stupid

deathz0r Online: The Internet Made Stupid

This wad is better than your pile of crap.<br><br> Read the story below for a real description.

Filenames
do-tims.wad
Size
15.16 MB
MD5
0cc5b0bfd12d01600399b2a39bdd6d02
SHA-1
5d0bb66bdc6c41bca11aebc35c7334a7f1df096e
SHA-256
389996f88016883e0bb115a1ec3d0e3cc6179574a9531ceb38ea862381290652
WAD Type
PWAD
IWAD
Doom II
Engines
ZDoom
Lumps
2193
Maps
DM01, DM03, SUPERINS, TORTURE, MAP01, DOTIMS01, DOTIMS02, DOTIMS04, DOTIMS06, DOTIMS13, DOTIMS16, DOTIMS18, DOTIMS25, INSTANT, DOTIMS12, DOTIMS17, DOTIMS19, IMPLODE, DOTIMS11, DM02, DM05, DOTIMS24, DOTIMS03, DOTIMS05, DOTIMS09, LONGLIFT, DM07, DM06, DM04, DOTIMS22, PLATFORM, DOTIMS23, DOTIMS10, DOTIMS20, DOTIMS07, END, PROLOGUE, DOTIMS08, DOTIMS15, DOTIMS21, DOTIMS14

Read Me

================================================================
Update to: do-tims.zip
================================================================
GET THIS HERE ZDOOM http://grubber.drdteam.org/doom/zdoom96x.zip

WAD Authoring Template V1.4   (Clip this line) <-- yay for
a 1994 template that was sitting on my HD
================================================================
Title                   : deathz0r Online: The Internet Made
			  Stupid
Filename                : do-tims.WAD
Author                  : Dean "deathz0r" Joseph
Release Date		: January 9th, 2006
Bugfix Update		: January 10th, 2006
Mapfix Update		: January 11th, 2006
Email Address           : [email protected]
Misc. Author Info	: Umm, I tell you how much your wad 
			  sucks. Yeah.

Description		: This wad is better than your pile of
			  crap.
		
			  Read the story below for a real
			  description.

			  UPDATE: It appears that I discovered
			  two important bugs after releasing this.
			  Those two bugs (involving the 1337ified
			  rocket launcher and a script bug in
			  dotims06 making the map unfinishable,
			  provided you "screw up") have been 
			  resolved, along with minor map bugs that
			  don't affect gameplay.
 
			  UPDATE 2: Map bug in DOTIMS14 where one
			  of the switches was not aligned properly,
			  although it was lower unpegged, making it
			  impossible to see. Rather unusual 
			  behaviour, but it's been fixed.

* Additional Credits to *

Hyena, Quasar, Lüt, Harvey, and everyone else who was deceived 
into checking out crazy.wad. Thanks for the great support, 
especially Hyena, who also made a map for this project, 
although I later decided to do this all on my own.

Hobbs and DomRem for providing me with tasty demos for the
startup.

Everybody who has beta tested this wad, who are listed in the
credits map.
================================================================
* Story *

While masturbating to hardcore rabbit porn, the infamous ISP
that you're connected to, deathz0r Online, has been tracing your
actions. Even though one of the staff at deathz0r Online was
somewhat enjoying your discovery (he was fired as soon as he was
found ejaculating all over the keyboard), the rest have decided
to place you against the ultimate test... to forcefully survive
the sheer horrors of the internet! You have been ordered by the
founder of deathz0r Online to visit twenty-five of the worst 
online hellholes that humanity has ever came across! Not only 
does nobody see them, but they have been infected with some 
really fucked up monsters. Only your bravery will help you 
survive this godawful punishment.
================================================================
* Maplist *

MAP01: do-tims Portal
BGM: Something from Silent Hill

PROLOGUE: Prologue
BGM 1: Some adagio tune
BGM 2: I found it somewhere
BGM 3: Nirvana - Big Cheese

* SINGLE PLAYER MAPS *

DOTIMS01: Entryway Tribute
BGM: Supar turbo MAP01!

DOTIMS02: I don't care what you think
BGM: The Twenty-Third Opus of Mister Sneezelpock

DOTIMS03: Twin Scortums of Mass Erection
BGM: Monstar Trumpet Mania

DOTIMS04: Look, in the sky!
BGM: Star Wars theme

DOTIMS05: Buttpirates'r'us
BGM: Pirate Hair Metal

DOTIMS06: Teenbopping fags
BGM: Megamix 199x

DOTIMS07: Vegetable sex
BGM: Grinding Lima Beans Into Lima Sauce

DOTIMS08: Not even Houdini could fit in a toaster
BGM: Dean's Crappy Imitation of Tom

DOTIMS09: Don't fart on my face
BGM: Ballad of Jimmy the Deranged Proctologist

DOTIMS10: Die, damnit
BGM: Fuegak Wears Long Johns

DOTIMS11: I see dead h4x0rz
BGM: This Water Tastes Unusual

DOTIMS12: Shoe shopping spree
BGM: 20% Off All Slaves And Foreigners

DOTIMS13: That damn dragon ate my balls!
BGM: Makafushigi Adventure (Dragon Ball Japanese theme)

DOTIMS14: Gothic Skullfuck Makeup Starters Kit
BGM: Painful Physical Pain

DOTIMS15: Homeless people suck
BGM: Friggin Marsupials

DOTIMS16: I downloaded this from Napster
BGM: Metallica - Enter Sandman

DOTIMS17: I paid a cop to arrest my mother
BGM: Risin From Da Ghettoz

DOTIMS18: Waiting in the Fileplanet queue for a 20kb file
BGM: Pushing It C-Section Style

DOTIMS19: I shot down a classroom once
BGM: Rollerblades Are Unhealthy For Domestic Animals

DOTIMS20: Internet relationships are a path towards suicide
BGM: Melodic Emotions Strangled Into A Bread Maker

DOTIMS21: Trapped in the 80s
BGM: You better not be serious if you don't know this...

DOTIMS22: The stock market got owned
BGM: Complete Soundtrack To Pong

DOTIMS23: The tomfoolery of Sir Derfarhinmankul
BGM: Permanent Headache

DOTIMS24: Intermission of an Intermission
BGM: Don't Question My Interrogation

DOTIMS25: The Dracula Jizz Rollercoaster ride
BGM 1: Diluteco - Just Kill Me
BGM 2: Nirvana - Endless Nameless

END: Credits
BGM: Greatest Guitar Solo Evar

* SHH SECRET MAPS *

????: You smell like a donkey's ass
BGM: Argicultral Tension

????: Title of this map to be announced
BGM: Extraterristial Government Agents Like To Probe Tongues

????: You're better off smashing your head into a solid wall
BGM: Dean's Crappy Imitation of Nirvana

????: Neverending Battle
BGM: Some classical midi I found

????: Torture!
BGM: Some classical midi I found part two

* DM MAPS *

DM01: Dwango5 Tribute
BGM: The Imperial Guard Marching Band Of Frodianmantletius Perform Dwango5 
     MAP01 (a.k.a Dean's Crappy Imitation of Dwango5 MAP01)

DM02: The Fun house
BGM 1: technochicken.mid (<3 xoap)
BGM 2: Big Bad Gangsta's Wrappin Rhapsody
BGM 3: Ragtime Is Outdated

DM03: Pit(s) of DOOM
BGM: Death Metal is Dead, like Death

DM04: LOL CTF RULZ
BGM: Ovary Gobbleclup Dumjock

DM05:
BGM: Depressive Antibiotic Warfare

DM06: Cave Uxdglvks
BGM: You Seem Like You Need A Cheesestick

DM07: It's Raining Men
BGM: See above line

* BONUS MAPS *

INSTANT: Instant Action
BGM: Igloos are worthy houses

* Other music * 

Title: Nirvana - Talk To Me
Intermission: If This Is A Dream, Get Me Out Of Here Now
Storyline: Answer the Telephone You Dumbass
================================================================

* Monsters *

First off, do-tims monsters are not referred to as monsters, but
they are all "deadly viruses". Remember, this is a virtual internet
headset thingiemabob!

Kekerangular - Your basic retarded virus, but always remember that 
	       their melee is amazingly powerful. They love hanging
	       around in gardens, irregardless of what orders their 
	       masters give them. Drops armour bonuses.
Kikiringulin - For when Kekerangulars get rowdy. Unfortunately,
	       their melee action is even more violent than
	       Kekerangulars. Drops health bonuses.
Retarded Goomba - Oh noes, an autistic Goomba! What has the world
		  turned in to?
Flying Goku - SUPAR SAIYAN GO GO GO
Emo - Dwelling in the most popular blog sites, these things believe
      that nobody is willing to help them get through depression.
      May suicide at will.
Blackfish Clone - The basic army of virii disguised as forum trolls.
		  Believed to have appeared from a site dedicated
		  to the king of hax0r undergrounds.
Sausagequatch - The standard guard virii class. Armed with an
		  Auto-Super Shotgun. Drops shells.
Buttpirate - They sail the deep ends of space without the need
	     of toilet paper. Because of that, they're prone
	     to spread AIDS.
Goth - Also dwelling in blog sites, these beasts believe that nobody
       is superior to their vast knowledge of common sense and
       allegience to Satan. They are also likely to commit arson
       by their early twenties.
Emoticon - :/
Sausagedic - They are essentially the medics of the do-tims universe.
	     They can revive expired viruses with ease. They also have
	     some magic staff thingie that hurts.
Mario Clone - Spawned from the deadliest pits of Sega fans,
	      these Mario clones are hellbent on destroying anyone 
	      who pauses a SMB game on the Nintendo Entertainment
	      System.
Sausagar - Deadly little shitbags that use mini-BFGs. Oddly enough,
	   they're incredibly weak against explosives and chainguns.
	   Drops cells.
Sausagient - They like to act smart. They think that by wearing
	     a "radiation suit", other viruses will believe that
	     they're intelligent beings. The homing rocket
	     launchers they carry double that belief that they're
	     smarter than anything in the virutal universe.


* Mini-bosses *

Baronotron - Some insane maniac decided it would be beneficial if
	     they spliced the DNA of a Baron of Hell and an
	     Arachnotron together. As was expected, that maniac had
	     died due to unknown causes.
Armoured Sausagequatch - The deadliest guard virus on the interent.
			 Their ability to use virtual weapons are
			 unsurpassed. They're rarely seen outside of
			 Sausage lairs. Drops boxes of bullets.
Abacus - These abominations were created to only serve one purpose:
	 To kill and make their victims stare at agony at its ugliness.


* Bosses *

Kekekingular - The overlord of the entire Kekeke clan. Is known to
	       be adored by all Kikiringulin.
Super Baron - Give a Baron of Hell a pack of valium and steroids, and
	      this is the end result. A flaming tower of hatred and
	      evil and other negative thoughts.
Sausagelord - The undisputed ruler of a Sausage lair. They carry
	      an unknown weapon of great power. They're also skilled
	      in the arts of stealth.
Mech - Towering mobile fortresses of despair. At least, that's what
       they believe they are.
Dracula Demon - Resides in what resembles Transylvania. He seems to
		always appear every hundred years or so. Has a strong
		hatred for anyone who possess whips.

================================================================

* Play Information *

Episode and Level #     : See Above
Single Player           : Yes
Cooperative 2-8 Player  : Yes
Deathmatch 2-8 Player   : Yes
Difficulty Settings     : Yes
New Sounds              : Yes
New Graphics            : Yes
New Music               : Yes
Demos Replaced          : Yes
May not run with...	: Dr. Pepper

* Construction *

Base                    : New levels from scratch
Editor(s) used          : Doom Builder, XWE, PSP5, MSPaint (you
			  won't believe what incredible powers
			  it contains), Goldwave, Notepad

* Known Bugs *

What

* Copyright / Permissions *

Authors MAY NOT use this level as a base to build additional
levels.  

You MAY distribute this WAD, provided you include this file, with
no modifications.  You may distribute this file in any electronic
format (BBS, Diskette, CD, etc) as long as you include this file 
intact.


* Where to get this WAD *

The usual: ftp://archives.3dgamers.com/pub/idgames/ and mirrors

FTP sites: Whoever is utterly stupid enough to mirror this

BBS numbers: Bwahahahaha, I just love this template!

Other: http://deathz0r.unidoom.org/

Maps

Dwango5 tribute

Dwango5 tribute (DM01)

Deathmatch Spawns
8
Co-op Spawns
1
Pit of DOOM

Pit of DOOM (DM03)

Deathmatch Spawns
8
Co-op Spawns
1
Neverending battle

Neverending battle (SUPERINS)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Torture!

Torture! (TORTURE)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
do-tims Portal

do-tims Portal (MAP01)

Deathmatch Spawns
8
Co-op Spawns
4
Entryway tribute

Entryway tribute (DOTIMS01)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
I don't care what you think

I don't care what you think (DOTIMS02)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Look, in the sky!

Look, in the sky! (DOTIMS04)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
6
Teenbopping fags

Teenbopping fags (DOTIMS06)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
5
That damn dragon ate my balls!

That damn dragon ate my balls! (DOTIMS13)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
I downloaded this from Napster

I downloaded this from Napster (DOTIMS16)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Waiting in the Fileplanet queue for a 20kb file

Waiting in the Fileplanet queue for a 20kb file (DOTIMS18)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
The Dracula Jizz Rollercoaster Ride

The Dracula Jizz Rollercoaster Ride (DOTIMS25)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Instant Action

Instant Action (INSTANT)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Shoe shopping spree

Shoe shopping spree (DOTIMS12)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
I paid a cop to arrest my mom

I paid a cop to arrest my mom (DOTIMS17)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
I shot down a classroom once

I shot down a classroom once (DOTIMS19)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Title of this map is to be announced

Title of this map is to be announced (IMPLODE)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
5
I see dead h4x0rz

I see dead h4x0rz (DOTIMS11)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
6
The fun house

The fun house (DM02)

Deathmatch Spawns
9
Co-op Spawns
1

(DM05)

Deathmatch Spawns
12
Co-op Spawns
1
Intermission of an Intermission

Intermission of an Intermission (DOTIMS24)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Twin scrotums of mass erection

Twin scrotums of mass erection (DOTIMS03)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Buttpirates'r'us

Buttpirates'r'us (DOTIMS05)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
5
Don't fart on my face

Don't fart on my face (DOTIMS09)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
6
You smell like a donkey's ass

You smell like a donkey's ass (LONGLIFT)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
19
It's raining men

It's raining men (DM07)

Deathmatch Spawns
15
Co-op Spawns
2
Cave Uxdglvks

Cave Uxdglvks (DM06)

Deathmatch Spawns
8
Co-op Spawns
1
LOL CTF RULZ

LOL CTF RULZ (DM04)

Deathmatch Spawns
10
Co-op Spawns
1
The stock market got owned

The stock market got owned (DOTIMS22)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
You're better off smashing your head into a solid wall

You're better off smashing your head into a solid wall (PLATFORM)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
5
The tomfoolery of Sir Derfarhinmankul

The tomfoolery of Sir Derfarhinmankul (DOTIMS23)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Die, damnit

Die, damnit (DOTIMS10)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Internet relationships are a path towards suicide

Internet relationships are a path towards suicide (DOTIMS20)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
5
Vegetable sex

Vegetable sex (DOTIMS07)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
5
Credits

Credits (END)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Prologue

Prologue (PROLOGUE)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Not even Houdini could fit in a toaster

Not even Houdini could fit in a toaster (DOTIMS08)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Homeless people suck

Homeless people suck (DOTIMS15)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
4
Trapped in the 80s

Trapped in the 80s (DOTIMS21)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
5
Gothic Skullfuck Makeup Starters Kit

Gothic Skullfuck Makeup Starters Kit (DOTIMS14)

Deathmatch Spawns
0
Co-op Spawns
6

Graphics